300 Grams Chapter 1

My whole life I kept on running after my love and during my journey I was always watching people, how they enjoyed the moments with their families, friends and their own selves. But I always thought I have to sacrifice to achieve what is right, as it was not only about me, it was about millions of other people. I believed if today I give sacrifice of my wishes and step on the throat of my dreams, tomorrow our next generation will be able to have fun of life which I never had.

*Takes deep breath and looks down at his arms* maybe these arms were not strong to hold the burden that I tried to carry and that’s why now i have to die under weight of this burden. *Throat starts getting dry and starts feeling the pain in his throat* I don’t know now what to do at the very last moment of my life, should I think about my mother who didn’t do anything but spent her whole life in growing me up to the level what I am or about my friends that I always thought of even though I never had much time to spend with them or would it be my beautiful wife who didn’t say anything but followed the path that I follow. *Tears make path through his face to the ground* why did I fail, why!

*Starts moving toward the end of roof and looks down the building* today when I will die all those who believed in me: my teachers, students, friends, family, strangers and specially the three, who never did anything but listened to me, did what I told them and believed in the foolish dream that I believed in. I wonder if they would start doubting me. I wish I had more time so I could write to them *Burst into tears but couldn’t make sound* what if there is no one here to see me die, to hear my last words and my last smile. Maybe it’s good they are not here as I can’t stop crying. There is no peace and it’s ironic to see everything is so white around me.

Everything has an end and this is my end, He said you can never tell when will you die, maybe today I became god as I can see the next. Sorry God today we will not talk as I am little bit angry with you but what can I do about you even if I am angry but before you punish me for what I said, I will punish myself on my own * Starts cleaning his tears with his hands and uses his sleeves to clean his noose, smiles with teary eyes* I guess some habits never change even when you are dying. *Starts moving, to make himself fall from the building*